


let me be your shelter

by markwatnae



Series: now and always [1]
Category: Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera & Related Fandoms, Le Fantôme de l'Opéra | Phantom of the Opera - Gaston Leroux, Phantom of the Opera - Lloyd Webber
Genre: Anxiety, F/M, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:22:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29815965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/markwatnae/pseuds/markwatnae
Summary: Erik confronts part of his past, and Raoul offers his love and support.
Relationships: Christine Daaé/Erik | Phantom of the Opera, Christine Daaé/Raoul de Chagny/Erik | Phantom of the Opera, Raoul de Chagny/Christine Daaé, Raoul de Chagny/Erik | Phantom of the Opera
Series: now and always [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2195793
Comments: 13
Kudos: 19





	let me be your shelter

Christine is out. Erik can’t remember where she’d gone tonight that would mean she left behind Raoul. Rarely did they go to engagements alone, but Raoul had kissed her goodbye at the door and then closed it behind her earlier that evening.  
He wishes this event had been scheduled for any other night.

He’d managed to venture out into town that afternoon. Christine had been delighted to see him off but she had been busy readying to leave when he returned.

Everything had gone right until he was leaving for home. He’d retrieved his items and was eager to get back. Until a traveling fair hawker stepped in his path and shoved a flyer into his hands. Already on edge being around so many people, he was too startled to react besides accepting the paper to get them to leave. He quickly disposed of it once he read the headline:

_See the real elephant man at the freak show!_

Below the words was a depiction of the man, his limbs much larger than a normal human’s and his face deformed.

He slipped behind the buildings and ran home through the alleyways, threw the gate aside, and rushed into the house through a side door, using the housekeeper’s stairway to get to his room.

He felt as if he were choking, if all the air had been sucked from the atmosphere. He watched Christine’s carriage pull away from the window and creased the hem of his vest in his hand in a sad attempt to calm himself.

It’s been nearly an hour now since Christine left. Erik attempted to seek out Raoul twice but lost his confidence before he reached the door. He didn’t know how to ask him for help. Their relationship is still so new, so shaky, and he didn’t want to risk ruining their tenuous connection with his instability.

A knock sounds on his door, softly.

“Erik, are you in?”

He studies the door intently, uncertain, losing track of time until the knob turns and he’s thrown back into the present. His breath catches.

The door stops opening and Raoul asks, “Erik, are you alright?”

After no answer, he tries, “Can I come in?”

A moment passes as Erik tries to find the air to form the word.

“Yes.”

Raoul steps from behind the door, worry creasing his brow.

“Is everything alright?” He asks, and Erik thinks he hears genuine concern there but perhaps he’s only wishing.

He steps back when Raoul approaches him but he’s unsure why. He’d overcome that urge to cower from Raoul once Raoul had reassured him his place in their home was not conditional and he would not be thrown out on the street on the slightest whim. As they grew closer, Erik had tested the boundaries of their relationship and grew comfortable.

Now he is unmoored once again and at Raoul’s mercy.

He barely surpasses the urge to flinch when Raoul touches his arm. Raoul’s grasp is firm but gentle when he cups his elbow.

“You’re white as a sheet. Sit down,” he says.

Erik sits on the couch gratefully but finds himself reaching for Raoul’s arm, desperate not to lose his touch.

“I’m here, I’m not leaving you.”

He focuses on Raoul’s hand on his arm, the other resting lightly on his knee. Raoul isn’t pulling away, abandoning him, but remains steadfast at his side.

“What happened while you were out?” Raoul asks carefully after a few minutes of quiet.

Erik’s throat feels as if it is closing but then Raoul is grasping his hands in his own, speaking soothingly to him.

“It’s alright,” he says. “You’re safe.”

Erik bows his head, a tear slipping down his cheek beneath his mask.

“Erik, did someone harm you?”

He shakes his head and some of the tension leaks from Raoul’s body.

“A traveling fair is in town,” Erik says finally.

A moment passes and Erik fears Raoul doesn’t understand, prepares himself to explain, but then Raoul leans against him, leaving a kiss on his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry.”

He breaks then, a sob ripped from his chest, but Raoul remains at his side.

“I won’t go back there,” he growls, anger sparking from that deep-seated fear.

Raoul shushes him gently. “Of course not. I’d never let them take you.”

Erik looks at him, searching desperately.

“I treated you badly before I truly understood you,” Raoul says. “I can only hope to make up for that time now if you’ll let me. But I have come to care deeply for you.”

“Because of Christine,” Erik says.

“At first, but I’ve come to realize your place in my life separate from Christine. You’re a very talented and interesting man. You have worth on your own and I finally began to see that. Now, I would never let anyone threaten your safety. You are a person deserving of respect and love and I won’t allow anyone to take that from you.”

Erik blinks and more tears fall. He shifts slowly to rest his forehead against Raoul’s, a tentative display of intimacy. His mask makes the connection awkward but Raoul squeezes his hands gently.

“No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears. I’m here, nothing can harm you. My words will warm and calm you.”

Erik’s eyes fill with tears. This song was Christine’s, he didn’t deserve it, yet Raoul was singing it to him.

Raoul’s blue eyes shine as he brushes tears from Erik’s cheek.

“Let me be your shelter; let me be your light. You’re safe, no one will find you. Your fears are far behind you.”

Erik breathes. “Anywhere you go, let me go too.”

Raoul smiles and it’s beautiful, radiant. They complete the song together.

“Love me; that’s all I ask of you.”

A moment passes between them before Raoul touches the bottom of his mask and then his hand retreats.

“May I?” He asks.

He’s seen Christine do it then. She never removes his mask without his permission and always moves her hand away from his face to give him the opportunity to say no.

“Yes.”

He’s careful, smoothing the hair that is ruffled in the mask’s movement. He smiles at Erik after he sets the mask on the couch. Two fingertips rest lightly on his jaw.

“May I kiss you?” He asks, softer this time.

Erik glances at Raoul, the naked affection in his gaze, and says, “Yes.”

Raoul cups his face in both hands and draws him in. Erik’s stomach flips at the touch of his hand on the right side of his face. The kiss is soft and warm, comforting in a way Erik has never experienced. Raoul doesn’t press him any further and instead pulls back but Erik chases him for another kiss. Raoul laughs and obliges.

“Erik? Raoul? Are you up here?”

Erik startles but Raoul soothes him.

“Yes, darling, we’re in Erik’s room,” he calls.

He strokes his thumb across Erik’s cheek before he takes his hands away.

Christine comes into the room, resplendent in a dark green dress, and smiles at the sight of them.

“How was your party?” Erik asks, heart still hammering in his chest.

“It was alright,” she says. “I was there just as an excuse for the opera managers to woo a new patron.”

“Did they get one?” Raoul asks.

“Yes, but I don’t care to talk about it right now. How was your night?”

Erik looks down, wishing he had his mask. 

“What happened?” Christine asks.

She comes to stand by them but Raoul gives her his seat, instead kneeling at their feet. He touches Erik gently on the knee.

“Would you like for me to explain?” He asks.

Erik nods. He reaches down and squeezes Raoul’s hand.

“There’s a traveling fair in town.”

He can’t stop the flinch that comes but Raoul turns his hand so he’s gripping Erik’s firmly. Christine gasps softly, reaching out to holds Erik’s arm.

“I assume there’s a sideshow,” Raoul says, gentle, and Erik nods.

“Oh, how horrible,” Christine says, her voice is soft but full of anger.

Raoul squeezes his hand.

“I reassured Erik that we would keep him safe from them,” he says.

Erik feels foolish. He’s stronger now, healthy from sleep and food and care, he could protect himself from those who would see him caged again.

But Christine presses closer to his side and strokes his cheek so softly. 

“Of course we will. I’d go to the ends of the earth to keep you from going back there,” she says, conviction in her voice.

“We both would,” Raoul says. “I would fight anyone who tried to take you from us.”

Christine strokes Erik’s hair. “Let’s have some tea before we go to bed.”

“That sounds lovely.” Raoul stands slowly, never taking his hand from Erik. “Would you like me to bring it up here?”

Erik shakes his head once, slightly. “Bedroom.”

“Of course.” He leans in—giving Erik plenty of time to move but he keeps still—and kisses him on the cheek. “I’ll be right back.”

Christine takes Erik’s hand. “Let’s get settled in the bedroom.”

He follows her obediently. He helps her out of her dress and into a nightgown. She presses her hand to his as it shakes slightly when he lays it on her waist and smiles sweetly at him.

“Let’s get you into something comfortable,” she says.

They’re lying on the bed together when Raoul returns. He smiles brightly and sets the tray at the foot of the bed before climbing up with them. They share tea and crunchy biscuits that Christine complains will leave crumbs in the sheets. Raoul kisses her and promises he’ll brush them away before they turn in for the night.

Raoul moves the tray off the bed after they’ve finished, now dressed in his sleep clothes and his hair mussed from Christine ruffling it. He laughs at something Christine says about the patrons she was forced to entertain that evening and Erik’s chest tightens.

He reaches out and catches Raoul’s wrist as he moves past him. He goes still as soon as Erik’s hand touches his skin and looks up to meet his dark eyes, expectant.

Erik brings his free hand up and touches Raoul’s cheek lightly, asking. Raoul nods and comes easily when Erik pulls him close. Erik’s heart flutters in his throat as he kisses him but Raoul is steady, willing, and warm. He even makes a quiet, pleased sound in the back of his throat that sends a thrill through Erik’s veins.

When Erik parts them, Raoul’s eyes open slowly and he smiles.

“Thank you,” Erik murmurs.

Raoul rests his hand gently along the curve of Erik’s jaw and tilts his face to press a kiss to his forehead.

“I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Raoul doesn't get the crumbs out of the bed.


End file.
